Long-Distance Relationships

It used to be hard for me to wake up in the morning until I met him. Snug beneath my blanket, I’d roll over to the annoying beeping of my cell phone and open my eyes to see a new text message from him in my inbox. Of course, I smiled. As I scrolled down and read the words, it said, “Good morning babe.” Other days, it just said a simple “Hey beautiful.” 

For the past 10 months, our relationship has grown stronger by the second. Even with speed bumps occasionally being thrown at us, we get through it. He’s a year older than I am and the time approaches for him to leave for college. Attending the University of California, Merced, we’ll be three hours apart.

This has got to be one of the hardest situations thrown at my feet. I’m deathly frightened and think about it on a daily basis. Friends tell me, “Oh, long-distance relationships never last,” but I digress. I won’t know until I give it a try. Until my boyfriend and I give it a try. Yes, it will be difficult, but who’s to say it can’t work?

I always knew this day would come. Over the past few months, I started to despise it and it instantly became my worst enemy. I asked myself multiple times, “Why can’t you just go away and never happen? Leave me alone.” I sometimes wished I had the power to stop time, but let’s face it, this is reality, not fantasy.

In less than a month, suitcases full of clothes and bags filled with materials will be carefully packed and placed into the trunk of a car. It will travel about 165 miles North from my hometown – Bakersfield. As my boyfriend, Justin, unpacks his bags and decorates his new dorm room, he will start a new life in a new city, meeting new people everyday, without me.

I remember one night sitting in his car underneath the glistening stars with the sunroof open. We were in the middle of my neighbor’s driveway, and I suddenly started balling. I couldn’t help it. All I could think was, “Oh my gosh, I don’t want you to go, what am I going to do without you? Stay here with me.”  At that very moment, my world came crashing down. Tears ran down my face and my shirt was soaking wet from using it as a tissue. I tried to laugh it off, but it didn’t work. He asked what was wrong and held me tight in his arms. He told me not to cry. I couldn’t even look him in the eye, because I was so embarrassed. He reassured me that everything would be okay.

When I recall that moment, my heart smiles. Justin was right. It will be okay, and it isn’t the end of the world. God constantly throws obstacles in front of me to keep me on my toes. In the end, I’ve learned I can only think positive thoughts and the only direction I can and should go, is up.

So as Justin and I prepare to meet my worst enemy, we tell each other that everything is going to be just fine. I’ve decided to befriend the enemy and accept it. I just have to look fear in the eye and move past it.

Honesty and commitment is the key to our success. I believe anything worth having is worth putting effort into. Justin is definitely worth having and we’re going to put effort into our soon to be long-distance relationship. We both understand this is a battle to be fought with sweat and blood, but we will withstand it. We will see each other on holidays and special occasions, as well as my senior formal and prom.

“I love you and you love me,” he once told me, “bottom line.”

- Juanita Pha